London: Everyone is hip with a sweater. Every idea you had about what you wanted to do that today, someone else already thought about it. Times a thousand. And they have more friends than you. There’s no space. Why so many people? London is the most important city in the world, say people from London. Newspapers are junk. Too many acronyms. It’s hip. Have you tried this drink from this place at this hour? There’s nothing else like it. Except there is. Lots of funny hats. Every place is sticky. Drinking at all hours. Voluntary baldness. Does the Queen approve of all this? Surely not. There’s so much to do, it racks the brain. Choice is a bad thing. But I like these crumpets. And there’s no place like London. The city is a thousand stories for millions of people. A hundred types of beer to fill your gut and haze your gaze. I think the waitress is from Poland but has an east London accent. That’s beautiful. Another pint, please.